Friday, November 25, 2011

Be a potbellied hero and dine with the cocoon of eaters

In this country a potbelly represents quite a number of stuff. In some quarters like Katanga a potbelly may just be a symbolic representation of how addicted one is to the bottle or straw for that matter. Yet in some quarters of this country a potbelly is simply a symbol of bullion. So as a citizen of this country each and every one that wants to be identified as a loaded guy needs to curve his way around a potbelly. You either have it or you will be considered a pauper for the rest of your life. By the way it does not matter whether you actually possess obscene amounts of bullion or you are a pauper. As long as you have one, just know that some one out there will be suspecting you of being a loaded guy or big man in this government.

That is why every Ugandan citizen that has a flat tummy and has dreams of ever becoming a hero in this country should by hook or crook develop a potbelly. He should develop one because soon it could be the criteria that will be used to determine who the true heroes of this country are. Yes, I think that that the criteria of having to pick from those that went to the bush to fetch a fundamental change, will soon loose value. For instance I am quite certain that there will come a time when all those that went to that bush have been made heroes and then the focus will turn to those that have used the fundamental change for some constructive purposes. And that is exactly where I believe the potbelly will become the yardstick for determining some of the people that will get hero’s medals in the near future. Obviously it is evident that one of the constructive ways we can use the fundamental change that our brothers brought from the bush is by developing a potbelly.

Otherwise why do you think some of the people that went to the bush have spent most of the time since they left the bush feeding their bellies? It is simply to develop them into recognizable potbellies. Period. But then I am not suggesting that some of you go and stuff yourselves up with all kinds of local brew just to develop a potbelly because a belly that is developed by the sumptuous meals of Serena or Sheraton is surely different from one developed from the over consumption of a local brew like Malwa or Ajono in Katanga. The potbelly that is developed from a generous supply of sumptuous meals is usually proportionate to the large size of the owner whereas that of a Malwa addict tends to appear so huge on the most likely skinny caricature of the owner.

So just in case you always missed out on being declared a hero in this country, it is not all lost. You could try out this method and may be it could become the reason for you to receive a hero’s medal a few years down the road. And that could turn out to be the only opportunity you will ever land in life to dine with the cocoon of eaters in this blessed curse of a nation.

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