Monday, March 21, 2011

Uganda's leading Opposition candidate Dr. Kiiza Besigye could turn out to be a sumptouos sausage

I could not believe it. I swear, I could hardly believe it when Mzee promised to eat our brother Kiiza Besigye and his opposition companions like "Cakes and Samosas." I always thought it is only those burgers in the August House of this country that love eating cake and Samosas but wapi even Mzee enjoys eating some of these things. However what mesmerized me more was the fact that our president also enjoys eating human flesh anti he talked of eating Kiiza Besigye.

Naye..kati...when our dear Mzee Kaguta finally decides to eat Besigye, is he going to just roast in eat him as Nyama Choma or is he going to eat him in raw? He could also decide to have him prepared as a boiled meal of human flesh for him but I would rather he seeks the help of meat experts such that he can have the best out of Besigye's human flesh.

Let him consult them. Other than eating Besigye as raw meat or Nyama Choma or as a meal of boiled source, instead he should seek the help of meat experts such that they can assist him make sausages out of Besigye's human flesh. Honestly, I strongly believe Mzee Yoweri must have had human-flesh sausages in mind when he was talking of eating Besigye like cakes and samosas because we all know that just like those two, sausages are always a breakfast delicacy.

Yet this will also help our dear president stand out. We all know that his ministers and parliamentarians are always munching beef sausages like that is all they have to do during their tenure of office. So how different would Mzee Yoweri Kaguta Museveni be if he also fed on beef sausages just like all the other political burgers of this country? He needs to stand out and there is no better way than for him to be the only man in this country that feasts on human-flesh sausages for breakfast after all he is the only man with a vision for this country.

But again we could also look at the fact that in the recent years Besigye's physical outlook and health has been slowly but surely improving over time and so it is quite wise of Mzee to have thought of eating Besigye at such a time and not earlier when some buffoons in this country accused the innocent man of being HIV positive. I am sure there would be no better opportunity than this to eat Besigye's flesh because at such a moment like this one his flesh would make relatively more sumptuous sausages. Don't you think so?

By Tiberindwa Zakaria

This Article is also published in my weekly column "Zak's Awkward Thoughts" in the Sunrise Newspaper

Besigye could to turn out to be a sumptuous sausage