Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Why I love to hate weddings

Now I had always thought weddings were all about carrying one's thrilled soul
into the house of God, exchanging rings, promising to live together till death does you part throwing you into hell or heaven wherever you deserve to be thrown and living happily there after but wapi that is not the case. It is not the case at least not from what I heard from my friend, James who tied the knot
recently. James says weddings are just more than those few things that I think weddings are all about.

To begin with, weddings, I am told are about what for lack of a better
phrase, I will call redundant and idle proclamations. For I do not know how
else I can refer to that madness of having to tell people things like “If
there is anyone with any reason whatsoever as to why so and so (for example
James and Caroline) should not be pronounced husband and wife should say it
now or forever hold your peace.” Obviously there are always some people
that have reasons as to why that couple should not marry but just decide to
shut their mouths up or hold their peace for that matter just because they
think weddings are so sacred to be tampered with not even when the truth is the reason for the spoiling of such PURE celebrations. Pure, my foot! Yet when
those seemingly eternal seconds pass, with everyone in that church saying
nothing and the celebrant in that case announces them husband and wife, this
couple will think it is done. A few days, weeks, months or years down the
road the people that held their peace for the few seconds to allow you have
the best out of your wedding party, despair and begin coming with children
that belong to that guy that you said you would stay with till death do you
part. Now that is when reality strikes. Unfortunately not long after this
reality strikes, you begin running up and down to the courts for a hand and
claiming that you can only stay with your husband till the courts do you
part. Yet at the wedding you had pledged that death would play that role of
parting you and your hubby. Redundant promises we should say.

Then, I am also told weddings are about tears. By the way, not tears of joy
but tears of distress and grief. For instance my friend Joseph had this lady
that he promised to wed but before the guy executed his pledges his closest
friend, moved in before him and exchanged rings with the lady. I and Joseph
attended the wedding but how I wish you had been there just to see how
exasperated Joseph was that day. I swear, it had never occurred to me that big
boys sometimes cry not until I saw Joseph that day crying, and real liquid
tears flowing. Tears flooded his eyes causing just two streams that ran down the right and left sides of his cheek with the thought of his closest friend betraying him with the woman of his dreams almost strangling his spirit. Obviously he could have said anything whatsoever to stop his friend and his former love from marrying when the priest urged him to but like I said he never wanted to tamper the PURE occasion.

On the contrary I had another friend that was almost choked with tears on
her wedding evening. Her name is Sarah. Everything had gone well, the
meetings were excellent, the organization of the whole party had been
brilliantly planned, the environment was exceptional with the sun giving the
earth a full shine but then it all crumbled at the altar when one mad woman
stood up. Yes she stood up to say something that would stop Sarah from
marrying the man of her dreams and left her drowned in a sea of tears as she
sank into amazing disbelief and embarrassment. Not even when her gown became a handkerchief to wipe her tears was good enough to dry them up. Now that is what a mad person that does not have any respect for the “purity” in a
wedding is capable of doing. A lot happened after but I am not good at telling sad stories and will just let the story end at that point.

Interestingly we all crave and dream for a beautiful wedding, the sweetest thing
that can happen to someone; so do some of us think but we should remember
that that can only be when we are as honest as we pretend to be when we want
to lure other people into tying the knot with us.

see related article

Traditional Ugandan Wedding Customs

By Tiberindwa Zakaria