When I grow up I want to be the Kabaka of Buganda

To begin with, I technically cannot be the Kabaka of Buganda (Uganda’s largest ethnic entity) because I cannot be Born Again. Yes I cannot go back to my mother’s womb and get reborn as a Muganda. I am from the famous Bunyoro Kingdom, what was once a powerful empire here in East Africa but which has now lost its lustre.

But still, I believe there is a way out for me. We can borrow ideas from the concept of being Born Again as understood within the Christian tradition. Under that concept, being Born Again has nothing to do with physical re-birth but rather a spiritual renewal that one receives after one has become an adopted son of the Most High God. That is how we that were once aliens to the promise, we that were once not considered children are now counted as brethren to Christ who is first born son amongst many brethren. Thus it is the very reason why we cry Abba father and also the means through which we have obtained an inheritance in the Kingdom of God.

Playing hide and seek games with my new editor

When a writer is tempted to pick fights with his editor in the name of writing an article, you know he’s run short of ideas. But that is not the case here. As a matter of fact, I have not run short of idea.

Besides, my new editor and I have enjoyed a perfect working relationship thus far, obviously apart from the usual squabbles about the deadlines. Once upon a time, I was very good at beating deadlines. These days, I am sloppy when it comes to beating newsroom deadlines. Unfortunately, that paper for which I write has now got an editor who is stricter on deadlines. So, for the last one week, we have been playing hide and seek games with my new editor online. Now someone is going to ask me how they play such games online. Well, with the advent of Facebook, Twiiter, Youtube, Googleplus and all other social media networks that are driving us mad, anything is possible online these days.

It's not sleeping sickness or nagana that is distubing Uganda's bigwigs

An interview with the Tsetse fly that is suspected to have spread Sleeping sickness/Nagana to Uganda’s bigwigs

The tsetse fly denies responsibility for the unfortunate predicament.

As we may all know, it is no longer news. The bigwigs in this God forsaken country we call Uganda have made it a habit to sleep at every budget reading and State of the Nation Address. It is almost two months since we last saw the people that matter sleeping during the budget reading and it seems illogical that the Wireless Connection has decided pick on this matter after two months. But you see the Wireless Connection is not the kind of place where you expect people to take logical actions. Anyway just for your sake let us cook up some explanation that we think will satisfy you.

We were still investigating the matter to establish which of the Tsetse flies in this country has the guts to enter into the mansions or bungalows of our beloved politicians to spread this sickness.

How I disorganized people's daughters in my final year on campus

I graduated from Uganda Christian University recently after getting an LLB (Hons) Degree but the most wonderful time for me on campus was that time when I was in my final year. And the reason is not hard to find.

You know, when you become a finalist, you become a defacto trusted consultant in the academic matters of your respective course.  I for one had all these young girls running after me to help them with their coursework and man I was more than glad to help out.

Why I despise girls who shun poetry recitals

My lady friends, I am sorry if this offends you but it is the truth. And I thought the earlier I speak about it the better for the friendship we share. You all know friendship is about openness. I am trying to be open about my convictions here so that we can share a more fulfilling relationship henceforth. I hope you all know that relationships are about taking the time to know one another’s needs, and going on to satisfy those particular needs.

Kenyans should donate the pork to Ugandans, not waste it on futile political campaigns

May 2013 ended on a very terrible note for me. The Kenyan Members of Parliament, a.k.a MPigs, sorry MPs, voted to increase their salaries. This means that all the pigs that those advocates used in the demonstration to dissuade the politicians from doing the obvious, increase their salaries: ­­­was a regrettable waste.

I hear mbu there will be another protest of a similar nature (read occupy parliament reloaded) on 11th June 2013. I hope there will be no pork involved this time around.